I didn’t watch the movie, but I think 40-year-old virgins are truly admirable. Far from knowing what sex is like, they are the ones who truly understand it better than some unmarried people already engaging in sexual intercourse. I mean, come on, do you really expect a pair of 17-year-old teenagers humping each other to understand the significance of what is it that they are really doing?
40-year-old virgins understand that the best gift that a person can give to a special someone is the gift of chastity. Only one person should ever receive that gift. The gift of chastity is a true gift of self, and that is what sex is meant to be - a gift of self.
Our genitals are the parts of our body that we protect most of all. Even at the swimming pool or at the beach, those are the parts that remain covered (most of the time). They are not for just anyone to see, not because we are ashamed of them. If we were ashamed of our genitals, we wouldn’t bathe naked, now would we? What are we protecting them from?
We are protecting them from the lustful gaze of someone else who sees them. Think I’m wrong? Then why is it (generally) okay for men to walk around naked among one another, and for women to do the same? Because they are safe from lustful looks. No normal person would look lustfully at the genitals of someone of the same sex. We will discuss homosexuality in another post.
Having said that, it is obvious that we hide our genitals only from members of the opposite sex because it is they who would look at us with lust if we were naked.
The only people to whom we reveal this most protected part of ourselves are those to whom that we reveal other protected parts of ourselves - to those that we bare our innermost secrets to. This is the gift of self that I am talking about. Sex is the gift that we offer someone we love, someone that we have bared our soul to and have received their bare soul. Sex is the physical expression of that love which has already been exchanged between two bare souls. The nakedness is the physical expression of the souls laid bare.
In addition, love begets love. The love between a man and a woman naturally produces an object of love, namely a child, a product of their love for each other. If it were not natural, then humans would not have to resort to artificial means of birth control.
The use of a condom, diaphragm or pill as an artificial means of birth control is indicative of the incomplete baring of souls between man and woman. It is because that one side or both sides are withholding something from each other which is why their bodies also withhold something from each other.
The question therefore arises: how can a man and a woman express their love for each other in a completely open way if they are, for financial reason or other, unable to raise children?
The Catholic Church is not against all forms of birth control, you know. It is only against artificial forms of birth control. The natural form of birth control is perfectly fine with the Church. After all, they did come up with NFP (Natural Family Planning), and that is more than just having sex during the infertile periods of a woman’s menstrual cycle. Much more than that.
In addition to a 98% success rate of controlling births, the NFP also instills discipline in a couple’s family, as well as ensures that any accidental pregnancies are not unwanted. This is because both man and woman are open to life that might be created as a result of their love for each other. They have not placed any barriers to their love, physically or otherwise, which is why any children that accidentally result from having sex despite using NFP are welcomed as a blessing from God.
Going back to our 40-year-old virgin topic, these 40-year-olds are by far one of the more disciplined groups of people in the world. If you don’t believe me, just try remaining a virgin until you’re 40, and see the kind of discipline it takes not to succumb to worldly pressures. This discipline serves them well not only sexually, but emotionally and spiritually as well. Any man or woman who finds themselves marrying a 40-year-old virgin is in for a solid, loving marriage.
So, if you know any 40-year-old virgins, be sure to praise them for their strict discipline in resisting the temptations of this secular world caught up in a false idea of sex.
If I’m not married by the time I’m 40, I want to be a 40-year-old virgin too!
You Should Also Check Out This Post:
- Sunday, July 1 - Are you free to say ‘No’?
- Saturday, June 30 - Hospitality
- Friday, June 29 - Keeping the faith
- Wednesday, June 27 - The golden rule of truth
- Question: What’s the connection between pre-marital sex and adultery?